It is a morning.

Yup, it has been a morning, so I feel I must write about it. Therapy perhaps? :)

1. Gary's birthday this morning. We enjoyed black forest cupcakes for breakfast. (Only 2 points each!)

2. As we left for Meijer to get groceries (always an adventure!), I noticed that each of my cupcake eating children had tell-tale signs on their faces. Simon was wearing a maroon shirt and red shorts. Noel's buttons on her dress were not . . . ahem. . .buttoned. (If she was 16 this would be a bigger issue.) Garrison had on his shorts that I got for free at a garage sale. This explains the condition of the shorts. I laughed and remarked that they were such rag-a-muffins. Of course Simon asked what rag-a-muffin means. I responded that my ducks look like they aren't quite ready to go out today. He added that they looked like muffins. Sure.

3. After a remarkably decent (only three time-outs) pass through the grocery store as well as several fights while I was doing the self-check out . . . I allowed the kids to ride the pony. We only do this about five or so times a year. Today was the day! After watching one mom wait behind me and then explain to her son that because there was such a line he wouldn't be able to ride today (sorry that my three riders were troublesome to you!) it was finally Noel's turn. As I was helping her get down. . . I saw a indecent view. Yup. She didn't put on underwear this morning. As I grabbed her off the pony while trying to keep her dress (a mini!) down as much as possible, she began to scream. Of course, a friends mother (Hi Mama Pyle!) passed by and enjoyed the spectacle I'm sure.

4. It is a beautiful day! Why don't you go outside and play? 10 minutes. Scream Scream Scream! Simon has been stung. Three times. Leg, hand, and head. I didn't know it, but if you get stung by a bee, then you can't use any body part on which a welt has appeared. He couldn't even eat, after all there was a sting on his hand. During our lunch, little sobs would escape his body. He did inform me (another piece of truth I didn't know!) that he would no longer be able to do his tricks in the basement (summersaults) and that when he was 18, then he might be better.

5. Noel is currently laying on the chair under a blanket. She says she is sick. When I asked her about it she explained. See, on the way home she asked why it was a problem to not wear underwear. I said that (among many reasons) she could get sick sitting on the pony at Meijer without unders on. Well. . . she declared that she is now sick.

6. I'm wearing a t-shirt from 1997. How do I know? It says 1997 on it. Talk about a rag-a-muffin.

I just called Gary and told him Happy Birthday (again) and that I am trying to be patient. I'm also laughing. After all--Garrison does still have cupcake on his face. :)

Vacation

Our first vacation of the summer. Our only vacation of the summer.

It

was

INCREDIBLE!

We went with my family to Fremont Lake. We enjoyed the water, each other, and our amazing God. My plan is to post pictures. I took over nine hundred. I haven't even seen them all yet. How do I narrow things down to 10-20 for the blog? Ack! It makes me tired to think of it. :)

There were so many wonderful things, but let me share some highlights with you.

Sunday night church service around the campfire.

My kids swimming better than ever!

Garrison and Simon tubing together.

Noel learning to swing by herself.

Seeing my siblings being great parents.

Gary and Garrison sporting fingernail polish.

Watching my kids run to greet their grammy every morning.

Zucchini bread.

Tonka pies.

I can still get up on water skiis and can even slalom! That's right. You read it. I can.

Tubing with my siblings and laughing hysterically.

Noel pushing her princesses on the swings.

Jumping from my tube on to my brother Kevin's tube. (A first for me.)

Fishing. (and catching fish)

Taking walks with adults.

Sunset cruises.

My boys kneeboarding (well. . . laying on someone on the kneeboard)

Pulling my three siblings on skiis and a wakeboard behind the boat.

Catch Phrase

Poopy Head (a card game: ask Ryan and Kate)

Seeing the cousins actually playing together. For extended periods of time.

Campfires.

A whole week with Gary.

Food prepared by my mom. Every night. For supper. And for three breakfasts. Yummy.

Coconut M&M's (thanks Gretchen!)

Kickball.

Triple Pickle.

Having others watch my kids for awhile.

Great things about being home again.

My bed!

A shower with some pressure.

Air Conditioning.

Nursing in air conditioning.

Sleeping in a room with Gary rather than Noel and Penny.

Consistent bedtimes (for the kids and for me!)

I don't smell like cottage.

Back to Weight Watchers!

It was such a great week. I love it that in the midst of my dysfunctional family, we had such a "functional" week. God has brought us together. We truly enjoy being together, crying together, sharing, encouraging, and serving each other. I wouldn't trade out one person. This year: two new people were in our midst and they did great! (Kody and Penny!) We bless God and are already planing for next year. [Garrison has begun a collection and Simon will be ready to go again on Thursday. Love my boys!]

I'll try and post come pictures. I know you want to see me jumping on my brother right?!?

Cottage List

We are getting ready to go on our cottage vacation. The list making has begun. The kids have added their own things to the list.

Garrison: a picture of a flower that he painted so that every girl at the cottage will like it

Simon: floss in case he gets marshmallow or zucchini in his teeth.

Noel: my mags (her stuffed animal) and candy

A rite of passage

I've been waiting for it to happen.

There would be a child who would see fit to cut some of their hair.

It wasn't bad.

I wanted to laugh, yet needed to let her know that "this wasn't o.k."

I kept my cool.

I took pictures.

I laughed a lot when she couldn't hear me.

I wouldn't want her to do it again.

Let's make a change

I'd like to propose a change to the alphabet. As my kids learn their letters as well as their sounds. . . I've come to a few conclusions.

1. We need to get rid of the letter "C". There are two other letters that serve the same purpose of this letter. All it does is confuse children. . . and some adults as well. We can use "K" or "S". Granted, we many need to come up with a new alphabet song and this could put millions into therapy. . . nevertheless it's time.

2. There needs to be more words that begin with the letter "X". I read so many alphabet books to my kids. There are many variations and possible words that being with "T", "L", and even "A". The letter "X"? Um. . . not so much. X-ray is the most popular with "X marks the spot" and "X-Mas" tied for a close second. Who do I need to talk to to add a few more practical words that begin with "X" to our lingo?

Do I have a witness?

Help.

Yesterday morning was. . . well. . . one of those moments. Some readers are nodding right now. :)

Garrison and Noel were fighting at the breakfast table, Simon needed something else to eat, Penny was crying, Smokey threw up in his crate, Penny then spit up on me, Noel kept hitting Garrison, Garrison was yelling at her, Simon didn't want to finish his juice and he had asked for it. . . then the phone rang. I tried to find it. Can you picture it? Please add to your image me in my pajamas, hadn't showered for two days, got spit up on twice during the night and already once this morning. Laughable.

I found the phone amidst the chaos deciding on the way I would only answer it if it was Gary. The phone read "STUD". (Gary put that in the phone. I like it.) I shared with him my angst asking if I could call him back.

Twenty minutes later with breakfast done and Penny sleeping. . . I called Gary back. He told me he had called my mom and asked that she come over the help. What?!? You didn't have to do that. I am fine. I can handle things. She can't come anyway Gary told me.

Half hour later there is a knock at my door and there stands my brother Kevin. "I'm here to play with your kids in the basement." I cried. He had called mom, mom had asked him to pray for me, he did and decided to come over and relieve me for a bit. In a humbling moment, I said "thank you". He was here for two hours playing, telling stories, and supporting me.

I don't like to ask for help. I don't like to accept help. I needed help and my family gave it to me. I asked Gary last night what made him call my mom. It has been crazy here many times and the moments always pass. They always do. Things will get better, this house ebbs and flows. He said he heard something in my voice that was different this time.

My life is great and I wouldn't change anything. This life can also be hard. This mama sometimes needs help. Thanks.

Happy Birthday Garrison

My firstborn is five. Five years ago I entered a brand new exciting chapter of my life. . . one that will never end. I'll always be a mom. I'm so thankful to God!

I must tell you though that we almost didn't have a birthday today. Garrison decided a few weeks ago that he wasn't going to have a birthday. He wasn't going to turn five. He would just stay in his room and stay four! He heard that he would have to get a shot, so that was it. He wasn't going to celebrate. No cupcakes. No presents. No going to school in the fall. Nothing.

Well, we did have cupcakes for breakfast. He did get a present from us. He will be going to school in the fall. He DID get his shots this morning. All four of them. They brought in extra reinforcements. I picked him up off of the floor in the corner. Two of us held him down. He screamed. Patients being brought back laughed. It was an event.

I love this boy. I love the way he cares for me and for others. I love his giggle. I love that he enjoys sports. I love that he tries to make up new rules for games when he isn't doing well. I love it that he puts on the clothes that are on the top of the pile. It doesn't matter what they are. I love it that he admits that he screamed when he got shots. I love it that he wants to check on the melon in the garden every day. I love it that he wants to go for a walk with me just so he can look for treasures. I love it that he likes treasures (even though they are really all trash). I love it that he likes learning Bible Stories. I love it that he loves God. Face it: I love Garrison.

A Simple Comment

Wow. It's been over a week since my last post. Welcome back.

I have been so blessed by the hope afforded to me about my dad. Today I had the kids color some pictures to send him for his birthday. He shares his birthday with Garrison. They are exactly sixty years apart. I think that is awesome!

The past eleven months. . . . what a ride. I've been pondering sharing something on my blog, but wasn't quite sure how to put it into words. I was finally inspired this week. I ran into a woman at Meijer. I know her from growing up at Graafschap church. (I'm so thankful for my "growing up church". Perhaps fodder for another blog post?) I greeted her and with a smile, she came up to me and shared these two sentences. "I read your blog. I'm praying for your family."

"I read your blog." Thanks so those of you who have found this place. There are friends here who read to keep up with the kids and their antics. There are old and new friends. There are those who followed our adoption journey and just stuck around. Finally, there are those who joined up when dad's addiction went public and they didn't know what was going on. This blog gave you a place to look. . . a place to get some of your questions answered. . . perhaps a place to judge me or my family. You heard differing stories and wanted to see where I stood. You weren't sure where to go for answers, so word of this place spread. Thanks for being here. Thanks for taking an interest in the Koemans. Thanks for reading and caring. I'm not even sure who all of you are, but you are welcome. If you see others who have questions, feel free to refer them here.

"I'm praying for your family." Here is the golden egg. One of the most powerful moments in my life is when people pray for me. Thanks to those of you who are praying for me, our family, my dad, my mom. . . our God is listening. That is great! Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you ! :) Please continue to pray!

What was really cool about this woman was that she talked to me. That may sound strange, but over the past months I've noticed that folks have very differing ways of interacting with me. Some are great (see the instance described above). Others. . . um. . . not so much. I've had people ask inappropriate questions or say inappropriate things. I've had people ignore the subject all together. I've had people avoid me. Guess what? I have eyes. I see you in the grocery store. I see you running away from me. Do you know how that makes me feel? I know that I've been guilty of doing the same thing in the past. I'm thankful that God is teaching me. . . and perhaps I can teach others. Here is a tip. TALK TO HURTING PEOPLE! Say you are praying (if indeed you are). Ask how they are doing and then listen. Feel free to say "I don't know what to say." I appreciate that so very much. You have talked to me to let me know you care. You showed that you were present. Send a note. Don't know what to say in the note? Write that you care and that you don't know what to say. You just wanted to let me know that you care. It doesn't have to be long. Hug me. I often feel that is what Jesus would do if He came and knocked at my door. He would just hug me. . . maybe even share a tear or two with me. Hurting people need their Christian community to show up.

Dad had pneumonia last week and was in the hospital for a few days. He is back in his new digs now and recovering. You can pray about that. Garrison's birthday is tomorrow and he is getting a shot. He has decided not to have his birthday this year and just sit in his room. . . so he doesn't have to get a shot. You can pray about that too. :)