Dad (s)

Did you stop by today to check up on me? Thanks. shhhh Listen.

""CLAP CLAP"" ""CLAP CLAP"" ""CLAP CLAP"" ""CLAP CLAP"" ""CLAP CLAP""

It's clapping. I'm clapping because my very big and personal God is so very wonderful. He deserves all of my clapping. Why am I clapping? I'm clapping because of yesterday. Here is what happened.

1. My mom, sister Tricia, brother Kevin and his wife Gretchen, and Penny and I traveled to Petosky to see my dad. We had safe travels and wonderful conversation in the car. I bless God for my family.

2. This may seem small, but I had a great lunch. I don't get to go out for lunch very often and it was such a treat to eat a fantastic sandwich.

3. We had a wonderful session with dad's counselor. He had so much information to share with us regarding dad's treatment and recovery. . . .almost all of it good! Did you read that? Almost all of it good! Oh, things aren't perfect. Oh dad has just received his education. . . living is a very different thing. It'll take years of dad being sober before the effects from the medication may not be felt anymore. Did you read that? Years.

4. Four weeks ago dad came to the conclusion that what our family did was the best thing that could have happened to him. He is so thankful that we stood our ground and forced him to examine what was really important to him. He wants to be in relationship with his family and was hoping that we would open the door a crack for him to begin and try that. Not only did the counselor share that with us, but DAD TOLD US THAT TOO! Amen and Amen!

5. We are excited to open the door a crack for him! We all told him that we love him, we will open the door a crack for him, but we are doing so with great caution. We are guarded and we are fiercely guarding our children.

6. I heard my father laugh. . . really laugh for the first time in years. I heard him coming down the hall before I saw him and I got so excited and nervous. I could hear my dad. I could hear the real him. He was joking with his counselor. Can you imagine how nervous he was? We laughed together because my dad can be very funny. I remember my humorous dad, but I haven't had a conversation with him in years. It was wonderful.

7. Dad held Penny.

8. Dad had something new in his eyes: sparkle. Oh how I have missed that. It means there really is a person in there. There was a sense of clarity we haven't seen for so very long. Once again. . . lots of clapping for God!

9. A bed opened up in a transitional home for dad. . . two days ago! Once again, the hand of God! Dad realized that he needs so much more help. He would be so very lost if he were to re-enter the big wide world on Monday. Instead, he'll be in this house with sixteen other guys who are all working towards their recovery. He'll be there for six months to a year. Long time: yes. Necessary: yes.

10. We all know that he is just out of the starting blocks, that the race ahead is very long and very difficult. There will be days of great gains and perhaps others of losses. Dad is the one who is telling us this. Dad's job is to get well. It isn't to be concerned about his family. It isn't to get well for his family. It is to focus completely on him, so regain pathways in his brain, to figure out how to live as a recovering addict, not a junkie.

11. (You thought I'd stop with 10!) Dad looks completely different. I'm not sure about clapping for that one, but if I saw him in a restaurant or some such thing. . . I don't think I know it was my dad. He has very little hair on the top of his head, lots of hair on his face (I've never seen my dad with a beard) and lots of extra padding all over. According to dad, there is a great cook at Harbor Hall and all he does all day is attend meetings. Kevin suggested to dad that he spend less time at the pool table and more time walking around it. We all laughed heartily about that one.

12. Penny was a gem. I couldn't have asked for better behavior from my darling. I'm very thankful for this as the car ride was great and I didn't have to miss much of the counseling time and none of the meeting time with dad. Thank you Lord!

13. God has given us time. Time to learn. Time to heal. Time to work. The door is open a crack. It'll take a long time before (and if) the door can be open again. Thankfully, we have time. All is not lost. We all need help to get better.

14. I felt so great. . . because of your prayers. Over this journey so far, the comment "I'm praying for you." has lifted me (and my family) up. It has also be a huge part of dad's journey. The Holy Spirit has been working, whispering, comforting, convicting, and encouraging all of us. I'm so in love with my God. Thanks to those who have prayed.

15. After I was home and processing my day with Gary, we received a phone call from Jerry Sprick. Jerry is Gary's biological father. He lives in California and I've only met him once. Gary speaks to him occasionally and I send periodic letters with pictures of the kids. He asked if he could come and visit us in September. He has been diagnosed with Parkinson's disease. We hope and pray that he will see God in our family. From what we know, he is not a believer. We know God is already on it.

What a day. What wonderful friends. What an amazing God.

Yes Mom

A friend posted this link. I read it and was convicted. I need to be more of a "yes mom". Here is the link if you'd like to take a gander.

http://www.jillsavage.org/2010/07/re-post-be-yes-mom.html

It is so much easier to say "no", especially when things in this house get a little stressful. That happens many times a day. So, now I'm trying to say "yes". Guess what. Things are better.

I had ice cream and diet coke last night at McDonald's (their cones are only three points!) with a wonderful friend. It was great because we talked a lot about parenting. I'm not an expert parent. I am a mom who tries (most of the time) to do my best. Last night I was able to really think about parenting again. The article above challenged me to think about my parenting. I need to keep growing, to keep learning, to keep trying to do the best with these amazing four gifts that God has given to me.

If you've got some some advice to help me be a better parent---send it my way. I'm always looking to learn.

Friday

Friday is a'coming friends.

On Friday, myself and several members of my family will be journeying together up to Harbor Hall in Petosky, MI. My dad has almost completed his three months of treatment. We'll be meeting with his counselor and with him.

I'm feeling. . . .

nervous

excited

anxious

hesitant

happy

hopeful

on edge

a bit distant

and the need to be covered in prayer.

Will you please pray for us? I'm not sure who I'm going to meet on Friday. I haven't talked with my dad since September. SEPTEMBER! He walked out of the intervention and that was the last that I've seen of him. Now, I'm going to talk with him again. Will he be the same man of September? Will he be the dad of my childhood? Will he be someone new? I don't know.

I do know that God knows. Psalm 139 tells me that "All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." Comforting. God is aware and in control. It also says in verse 10 that "your (God's) right hand will hold me fast." Do you know what? The same hand that is holding me fast is also holding my dad. It also holds my mom, my siblings, my kids. . . oh I'm so very thankful.

I don't know what Friday will hold for us. I DO know that God is aware. God has got it. God will show us, comfort us, protect us, lead us, guide us, and most of all. . . hold us fast.

Lots of activities

I thought we'd take it easy this summer, considering that we have a new baby and all. But alas, we are busy and loving loving loving it. We aren't traveling all over, but we are getting out. . . more than I anticipated. That is so very good since this girl likes to have one adventure a day. I'm watcha call a "stay-at-home-most-of-the-day" mom. :)

I thought I'd finally upload a few of our several hundred pictures from the past two months. A friend just looked at my latest scrapbook and commented that there were some good pictures. Of course there are! If I take lots of pictures, I can find a few that are wonderful. I don't publish all the crappy ones. :)

Simon is very into puzzles. Our friend Mrs. Jones loaned us her big puzzle and Simon and daddy spent a Saturday working on it. (Truth be told, Daddy stayed up well past his bedtime to finish it.)

We moved the picnic table under the gazebo and wah-la. . . we eat outside more!
Doing the smore thing.

She kept insisting that she wasn't tired and even stood up to prove it. Alas, she just had to "rest".


Garrison enjoyed his first camp experience. BASKETBALL!

I love that babies are so compact.

Penny loves bath time, and Garrison is checking it all out.

She adores her Grammy already.

They all had to wave good-bye to Daddy. Even Smokey!

Uncle Koe stopped over and decided to teach the boys about science. Here, they are watching a marshmallow in the microwave.

Tunnel Park. Big Hole. Much Fun.

I think they entertain each other.

She is such a smiler!

Tea Party

My mom invited my niece and Noel over for a tea party. Noel still talks about it. I was asked to leave as soon as the attire was aquired and the tea party (with tea and crumpets as well as "conversation") began. It was an amazing morning. Enjoy the show!

"I rang the bell, but am not so sure about this."

Doesn't she look just so small waiting at that door?

The door opens and Noel approaches.
Look at these beautiful ladies!

Noel gets a sneak peek of the tea and crumpets.

"Let me show you the crumpets."

It is time for Noel to choose her "tea outfit"

"Would you like to wear this hat?"


She found the right one.

"I am beautiful."

What sophisticated ladies!

"W" thoughts

W: Weight Watchers. I'm counting points. Yup, I've rejoined Weight Watchers. In 2002-2003, I turned 30 and decided to change my life. I loved my 20's, loved the adventures, loved where God took me, loved the friends that I made. . . . but it was time for a change. I cut my hair, had a 30th birthday party/shower, and lost 90 pounds. Then, I met Gary. Yes, my 30's were off to a great start. Since then, I've put weight back on with each pregnancy, and taken it off after each pregnancy. So, I began again. I did it on my own after Garrison and Noel, but I rejoined the actual Weight Watchers meetings/weigh-ins. I'm going public. I feel so much better already (I've been doing it for a week and a half) and by telling my blogging friends, I'm more accountable. :)

W: Watch out! Last week my daughter Noel almost drowned and I was (and still am) a bit shaken. Two days ago a 4 year old boy was killed in a parking lot in Holland. I'm more aware than ever that I need to keep my two eyes on four kids. Challenging? yes. It is worth more than the camera (which died in the lake rescue) or any other possession I own. (The word possession looks quite crazy--why does it need so many ss's?)

W: Water. I love drinking it, I love swimming in it, my kids are addicted to our kiddie pool on the deck. I'm so very thankful that I live in a state with Lake Michigan. I love that several friends are willing to share their pools with us. I'm thankful my kids start swimming lessons next week. I'm looking forward to a week on the water in August with the family. Did you know my nick-name at Camp Roger was Queen of the Deep? I have a sweet looking orange cup (shocker) that I carry around the house so that I always have water to drink. Yup, I'm in love with water.

My girls

Here is the link to see some photos from Sears. I took just my girls in. Noel is 3 years old and Penny is six weeks old. I couldn't be more proud. :)

http://www.SearsPhotos.com/ViewSharedAlbum.aspx?ShareID=5edebb38-eaa0-4044-bb62-38c80a742e56

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