Personal Info on Shanda

If hearing personal info about me isn't what you were looking for, then move along.  Confession is good.  Admitting things are good.  Putting it into writing--well hopefully it will be good.  :)

So, for the past few weeks I've found myself being crabby.  I've been a little irritable with the kids.  I'm yelling.  I'm getting exasperated.  I'm an amazing mom in public. . . and then I get on them when I'm putting them into the car or as soon as we are home and folks aren't watching.  They are just doing all kinds of things wrong--it is all their fault I'm sure.  O.K., so I know that isn't the truth.  I just couldn't seem to get on top of it.  I would wake up and spend time in my devotions and talk with the Lord about it.  Then. . . here we go again.  

So I had my annual physical two weeks ago, you know. . . the one that every woman loves and looks forward to?  Yes, that one.  I generally do not talk things over with my doctor.  I don't like it.  I know, more lessons that I need to learn--not for this blog post.  BUT, this time I decided to bring up this whole crabby thing with him.  I was thinking that perhaps I was going through "the change".  I don't know much about "the change" as my mother's generation tends to not talk about such things (shhh) and among my friends I'm am in the elderly category.  I'm turning 40 this fall and I've heard that "the change" can happen.  Once I got that in my head. . . I may have used it as an excuse to be crabby.  Maybe.  So, I talked with the good doctor about it.  Turns out, I'm not going through the change.  I'm just crabby.  

Seriously, what we discovered is that I'm stressed out, not from bad stuff but from GOOD STUFF!  What?!?  We've been having so much fun and enjoying this summer--every minute that we can!  I've loved it.  I've loved all of the great activities that we've been able to do, both around our house and on vacations.  Lovely!  The problem is that the busyness has been creating stress.  Interesting.  So what am I doing about it?

1. I'm responsible for being less crabby.
Just knowing this has made me less irritable.  I've had a great couple of weeks.  I'm loving life.  I'm patient with my ducks.  It is great.  Just knowing that it wasn't a hormonal thing helped me to take ownership of the situation.
2. I'm chilling out a bit.
We forgot a towel?  Oh, we'll share.  We are 10 minutes late to a park playdate?  Then we are 10 minutes late to a park playdate.  Can we do something tonight?  Nope, it is family time tonight, but we'd love to come over another time.
3. I'm done at night.
This isn't anything new, but I'm still going to celebrate it.  When the kids go to sleep, I'm done working.  O.k., so sometimes I'm done working before the kids go to bed.  The point is that the dishes and the laundry can wait until tomorrow.
4. I'm going to enjoy the moment rather than get wrapped up in all the details and behaviors of the kids.
Rather than watching the clock or the misbehavior or the wallet or the other great moms. . . .I'm watching my kids.  They will only be 7, 6, 5 and 2 once.  This is the only summer that we get at these ages.  I love them and love being with them.  They are goofy.  They are sensitive.  They see God in ways that I don't.  They smile in certain situations.  They have gained new skills.  When I get beyond and see them. . . how could I be crabby with that?