Adventures in grocery shopping

I ventured out to a new grocery store this morning. My "usual" store is familiar. I know many of the checkers by name. Kathy on occasion has opened a lane for me knowing how challenging it is to grocery shop with four children. Thanks! I make out my list according to the layout of the store. I know exactly where I need to go and where my items are. I know what mornings are crazy. I enjoy it. . . grocery shopping. I love finding the deals and thinking about how to take care of my family.

This morning I felt a little lost. Some things are the same, but I struggled with knowing where everything was. I did leave without Febreeze. It was on sale and I had a coupon--I couldn't find it. Shucks. I ran into so many people that I knew. .. another new experience for me. Hi to all! I even attracted interest from strangers. When you have one daughter who dances in the aisles and another who smiles if you but look at her. . . there was one dear older Hispanic woman who cooed to Penny in Spanish. Penny was fascinated and gave her some love. Others kept peeking into the carseat to "see the baby". Guess what Penny did? Yup. . . smile smile smile. Noel showed several patrons the fish. I find myself shaking my head a lot while we grocery shop.

So, why did I make the switch? Why would I leave the store I know to go to another that frustrates me? My dad. My dad is back in town. After his long stint somewhere in Canada he has decided to return to Holland and is living in a hotel on the north side of Holland. Though it would be fine if I ran into him, I do need to protect my kids. They adore their Gramps and we still speak very lovingly about him. I don't want them to see him yet, especially at a grocery store.

Dad is still very sick. After being asked to leave the transitional house for not adhering to the guidelines, after admitting at the end of rehab that he shouldn't come back to Holland for fear that he would fall back into his previous lifestyle, after a very long vacation with no accountability. . .he is back. For the first time he asked my mom about my kids. For the first time he admitted that he had made some mistakes. Yeah! That is a great start dad. The problem is that he wants to move back in with mom and is using every trick in the book to do that. He manipulates. He whines. He gets upset. He turns friends and family against us. Yet, we are committed to staying healthy. We are committed to helping dad whether he sees that or not. Moving back in would be one of the worst things that we could do at this point. EVERY addiction counselor (including ours. . . and dad's when he was in rehab!) would say that. Why do I tell you this? First, please be in prayer again for our family. We need it. Second, if you see my dad--welcome him back and tell him that you are praying for him (if indeed you are). If you see my mom--tell her that you love her and are praying for her. What a hard road she is walking. If you are uncomfortable talking with any of us, yet want to tell us of your support or your prayers then send a note. My mom and dad hope to begin counseling together in the next couple of weeks.

We want dad to be better. Being better doesn't mean the same thing as being comfortable. Being better might not be the easiest. Being better won't happen without time and hard work, for all of us.