Jeans

I was lovingly chastised this morning at Bible Study.  There is a woman. . . in her 80's. . . and she is stylish.  Hair done every week.  Stellar outfits.  Proper.  Doesn't miss events at church.  A bit crabby. . . o.k. she is a lot crabby.  (I have such a heart for the seasoned saints, I think I always have.  I learn from them and love chatting with them.  I so much enjoy having them in my Bible Study group as they add tons of knowledge and encouragement to this young(ish) mama.)  So she is very concerned with my well-being.  I am often pulled aside by my elderly friend for some comments.  "My children were not potty. . . excuse me. . . toilet trained as young as hers.  I do look better in a dress.  It is about time I begin to wear more make-up--I look so much better with it!  And she certainly did it all with four children under five."

Today she talked with me about my attire.  I wore a skirt to Bible Study last week: something I rarely do as I own one skirt.  I don't feel comfortable in it.  I'm a jeans and sweatshirt kind of girl.  I'm trying to do some things differently though.  I'm about to embark on a clothes buying streak and I'd like to look the best that I can.  I want to feel good and look hot--I'm in love with this guy and I'd like to look a bit. . . ahem. . .sexy for him.  :)  Anyway, this morning I was in jeans and a sweater and she expressed her displeasure.  I had worn jeans to church on Sunday and this was a big no-no.  It is not right for me to dress like that.  She decided to chat about this in front of a group of ladies all sitting at a table.  I smiled and moved on.  She did like it that I had lipstick on though so at least I scored a few points in the good column.

Now, I'm not really bothered by this.  I do like to dress up for church which often includes wearing my best jeans.  Sometimes my church choices are limited because few things fit.  When I was little we wore a dress every Sunday.  I remember shopping for one fall/winter dress and then again for a spring/summer dress.  Every Sunday.  Same dress.  Thou shalt not wear pants.  I attend a church now where all kinds of clothing is accepted.  I'm thankful for that.  You are welcome to come to our church in a dress or in jeans.  You can wear a sweatshirt.  You can wear heals.  Just be dressed.  Several girls have radical hair colors, there are many nose rings, and even some three piece suits.  One family even has mohawks on occasion!  (That would be us!)  Frankly, I like that.  Come as you are and let God meet you there.  He loves you.  He cares for you.  As a family, we do wear different clothes for church.  My kids have their "Sunday clothes".  They are clean.  They don't have holes.  Why do I do this?  I want to feel a little different for church.  I want all of us to say "Hey God, are you important enough to wear our special clothes."  Some folks wear a dress every Sunday.  Some folks wear a hat every Sunday.  I respect that.  If you worship God best with a dress on--AMEN!  Worship God the best that you can.  Yeah!

So, this blog post is about Sunday attire?  Nope.  Being confronted about stuff like clothes?  Nope.  I know there are many opinions and I believe there isn't the same answer for every person and every church.  Folks, cultures, cities. . . so many differences.  Here then is the best part--the point that I'd like to make (finally right?!?).

After I had moved on and was getting a cold Diet Coke another seasoned saint named Ruth approached me.  She had been at the table while I was being chastised.  She came and put her hand on my arm and apologized.  She looked me in the eye and said that I was fine and beautiful.  She told me that this other woman shouldn't have said what she said.  She wanted to make sure that I was o.k.  Do you know what else she did?  She didn't gossip.  She didn't belittle.  She didn't put down either myself or my "don't-wear-jeans-to-church" friend.  She handled herself with grace and poise.  I'd like to be like Ruth.  I'd like to encourage some folks on the sly.  I'd like to not make a big deal.  I'd like to tell another woman that she is beautiful with or without lipstick.  I'd like to make sure folks are o.k. when something might have made them feel uncomfortable.  Thanks Ruth.  Thanks for doing Kingdom Work with a smile and a touch on the arm.  You certainly gave me some mercy and I'll make sure to do the same for others.