600 posts

I just hung up the phone with a friend.  Not true.  I hung up the phone, asked Simon to go back outside because he was all wet, checked the pumpkin muffins, passed out popcicles, tightened goggles, checked for a wasp nest, dried off my feet, grabbed a drink, sat down to look for a recipe which uses rainbow chard, got up to change the radio station because I can't stand listening to Adam on JQ 99, sat back down and thought again about my phone call.

I had unloaded.  There was a ton sitting on my head and I unloaded to my friend.  She let me.  I have let her before too.  We go back and forth.  I hope that you have a friend like that.  I had talked with Gary earlier this afternoon about how scared I was about the adoption.  I'm afraid.  I'm not at all afraid that we made the wrong decision.  NO WAY.  God placed Michael before us, but there are so many unknowns.  The classes we have taken, books we have read, information we have received from the Treacher Collins Yahoo Group have opened our eyes.  I got a case of the "oh no!  I'm afraid of what lies ahead of us" syndrome.  Thankfully, there is a cure.  My God.  He is the cure for this.

He already knows my son.  He hand-picked Gary and I to be the parents of this sweet boy.  He knows that our lives will be forever different and very challenging in many respects.  He knows this.  He knows how to equip us to handle physical difficulties.  He knows how to equip us to handle emotional attachment issues.  So I can rest in Him.  That doesn't mean that I do nothing!  How can God bless nothing?  I'm going to pray.  I'm going to learn and ask questions and read and search and fall back on prayer.  I'm going to thank God for friends who let me unload.  They will not judge but rather assist me in carrying these things.  See God has that too!  I'm going to say "Wow!  Thanks!" when handed a rather significant sum of money at church on Sunday morning from a surprising giver.  I'm going to bless God and marvel and how He is already providing.

This is post number 600.  It began celebrating what God is doing in my life and it will continue.  Post 700 800 and 931 will be about what God is doing in my life.  He is woven through adoption and addiction.  He is woven through my marriage and my kids--all five of them.  I don't know what the future holds, but I know who holds the future.